Top 10 signs your DBA might need to retire

The top 10 signs your DBA might need to retire:

1. Complains about these "new fangled stored procedures".
2. Rants about the good old days of Oracle PE (Punchcard Edition).
3. Thinks Thomas Kyte is a whipper-snapper (even with the beard).
   
4. Still demands all Oracle manuals in hardcopy.
5. Has a service request with Oracle Support to forward port the RBO to 11g.
6. Knows about Edgar's secret 13th rule.
7. Thinks Oracle Support went downhill when they moved the HQ to Redwood Shores in 1989.
8. Has larry@rsi.com in his address book.
9. Still replaces blank lines in PL/SQL with single line comments.
10. Has an open 10 year old Oracle Support "TAR" to fix a bug in version 7 which he/she wont close because of the "principal of the thing."
    

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(Yep, still a slow week while I prepare for OOW and the AUSOUG conference, as well as teach a SQL course. I promise no more "DBA bashing" ;)